Porn vs War

Posted on Mar 4, 2011 in All Articles, Featured Articles, Humorous, Writing

Warning #1: This post may change the image you have for me, but it shouldn’t. Humor, in all of its instances, is a sign of a healthy mind.
Warning #2: If you aren’t comfortable reading about porn and despicable sex acts, please, do not read any further!

I’ve given a fair amount of thought in this post’s subject. What are the differences between war and porn, if any? Actually there are many. I won’t tire you with a long prologue, here are some of the differences I’ve found. If you can think of any more, post them!

  • Warlords come and conquer. Porn stars conquer and cum.
  • In war they provide you with a gun. In porn you come with your own.
  • In porn the enemy helps you get a headshot.
  • You can make war in the dark.
  • In porn you try to look good in the camera. In war you don’t want to look good.
  • In war everyone hates assholes. In porn everyone licks them.
  • In war women are spared. In porn there is no mercy for them.
  • In the army you shave your face. In the porn industry your genitals.
  • In war privates doesn’t get much publicity. In porn it is all about privates.
  • In war the enemy tries to avoid your load. In porn she tries to swallow it.
  • In porn you can’t wait to stand in front of enemy’s canons.
  • In porn the other side easily turns their backs on you.
  • In porn your enemy may ask you to violate her human rights.
  • In porn pain can be an aphrodisiac.
  • In porn you don’t see many helmets.
  • In porn 2 vs 1 is fair.
  • In war impalement is used as capital punishment.
  • In war you don’t want many opened fronts.

I may or may not update it in the future!

 

PS. Since I feel good about this, here is a photo for your viewing pleasure.

 

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1 Comment

  1. Nice and funny Marios! Keep it up!

    > In war blowing stuff is mainly a man’s job, but in porn it’s mostly a woman’s!

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